8 Months!

This past Friday, I hit the 8th month mark in our pregnancy! Which means I still have 8 weeks to go because pregnancy math makes no sense.

8 months in; hubby, baby, and I!

We've been killing the time by taking advantage of the many classes our hospital offers. We took a child birth class, an infant care class, a breast feeding class, and an Infant/Child CPR class.

Ryan can hold a doll. WE GOT THIS.

We took the labor class first, because I was the most nervous about that one. My original birth plan was "get an epidural at week 38 and black out until they put the baby in my arms". By the time we arrived at the class, a dear loved one (who is a wonder woman and my hero) had given birth unexpectedly fast; she and her husband delivered the baby themselves at home. While by all accounts this was a beautiful and empowering experience for them, new fears set in and I modified our birth plan to "check into the hospital at week 30, drink juice and watch day time television for two months."

When we got to the class, I made Ryan promise to keep me in sight. I was afraid I might cowardly-lion-it out of the room half way through. It wasn't so bad though!

Except for some of the videos....

It wasn't so great either, but I felt much better after taking it. We were taught what to expect in the different phases of labor, pain management, the different outcomes to mentally prepare for, and shown the practices and policies of our hospital in action. Some of the unknown was pulled away from the ball of fear bearing down on me, and I left feeling much more confident.

Plus, they gave us informative books with great diagrams.

"Who's Daddy's fat little frog?"

AGAIN, if pregnancy is so natural, explain to me why our bodies fail
to take our bladders into consideration?

In one booklet on comfortable resting positions during pregnancy, a series of pictures really cracked me up. I have to share them. This woman is actually pregnant, you can tell by the misery tearing apart every inch of her face.

Even rocking her mime look, this woman right here is the realest. 

This is me. Every day. Only no pants and way more crying.

"Is there anything I can get you, dear?"
"Killlllll meeeeeeeee...."

One of the best classes we took was the Infant/Child CPR class. It went over a lot of safety issues, including ways to prevent SIDS. We knew some of them and had already decided we won't have bumpers in the crib and the baby will doze in a sleep sack instead of blankets. Friends with little ones had warned us about blanket dangers, and praised sleep sacks highly.

It helps that they're cute as heck.

Still, if you're like me and you have a vagina and access to the Internet, chances are you're on Pinterest. I've spent the past year and a half pinning adorable nurseries, most of which showcased adorable bedding sets. I'll admit it--the nursery decor has been very high on my list of priorities. (WHAT ARE BABY WIPES?) Even knowing we did not really need a bedding set, Ryan and I still initially registered for one.

Before Infant/Child CPR class, you see the glossy ads and sweet pins like this:

"It's cool," We thought. "We'll just drape the quilt over the side. Adorable!"

Then you go to the safety class, and you learn more than you ever thought to worry about.

Did you know sometimes the soft, squishy mobiles fall in the middle of the night
and go down the baby's throat? It's happened. They say to save those for changing tables.

And suddenly all the glossy ads and sweet pins look like this:

THAT QUILT WILL FALL INTO THE CRIB IN THE MIDDLE OF THE NIGHT
AND IT WILL BE LIKE THAT SCENE IN TRAINSPOTTING ALL OVER AGAIN.

Ryan and I exhanged nervous looks in class, frantic that our CPR dummy was never going to make it. We went home and immediately took all the cute bedding off our registries. We have fitted crib sheets, and one of his aunts is knitting us an Afghan. We can carefully place it over the rocking chair or cuddle the baby in it during the day when we can see him. That will be lovely. Maybe our parents all did it differently, maybe we all survived. But you know what? Overwhelming love aside, I won't even let someone slam a door when I'm baking a cake in case it collapses in the oven. There's no way I'm risking harm to a person I made from scratch in my own body.

And so, instead of a precious keepsake-quilt-turned-1950s-monster-movie-villain, we decided to get fabric for a few fancy (and safe) swaddling cloths. Only, of course, we didn't like any of the woodland themed fabric at the stores, so we decided to design our own on Spoonflower.

Some paintings for different patterns.
Ryan was really mad woodland prints never have bats, so ours will.

If you're an artsy creative type, check out Spoonflower. My pal Bonnie pointed me in its direction, and I have been dreaming up fabric patterns since. I am really excited to try it! I'm not the only one. It's pretty cool when you can tell your husband about a textiles website, and his response is, "That sounds awesome! Send me the link, I want to design some fabric too."

We plan on designing/sewing/embroidering most of the nursery decorations ourselves. I want to make a few rag dolls based on the woodland creatures in our fabric patterns, to sit on a high shelf patiently waiting to play until our son is just a wee bit older (like, toddler age). I'm going to embroider some hoop art for the walls too, if my nervous energy holds strong.

The cats can tell something is changing, and they have been all over me lately. I usually wake up with one of the boys curled around my belly, and Lupin has pawed back at a kick or two. They have been right in the thick of it as usual, lending their paws to help.

Puck has volunteered to get my baby holding muscles toned.

Lupin and Elvis keep me company while I practice Sad Pregnant Mime's
comfortable pregnancy positions. (This is the 'Crying in Bed with Fig Newtons' pose).

Lupin and Puck testing out the changing table we scored
at Good Will for $30. Brand new, great condition! YEAH!

That's our 8th month update. Baby is doing great, nervousness is building to a reasonable level, classes have been fun, and we cannot wait to meet our little man!